By Marco Shalma

You hear it everywhere. “I love New York.” People wear it on hoodies. They caption it under skyline photos. They post it after a Broadway show, a slice, a subway selfie, a weekend in Williamsburg. But loving New York used to mean something heavier. Something earned. Something lived, not branded. Today, everyone wants the image of New York without the responsibility of acting like someone who actually lives here.

Start with presence. The city used to be built on it. You showed up for your block. For your bodega. For your bar. Foot traffic was the engine of entire neighborhoods. But between 2019 and 2023, according to multiple retail and mobility studies, foot traffic across key corridors dropped, while delivery app usage surged by more than 30%. People outsource everything now. Groceries. Takeout. Laundry. Social life. You can live in New York for months without ever engaging with the people who keep this place alive. Everyone says they love the “New York energy.” But half the energy came from people being outside in the first place.

Then there’s the noise, not the literal kind, but the cultural kind. New Yorkers used to argue, debate, challenge, roast, and exchange ideas in real time. You walked through any park or diner and heard conversations that could power a generator. Now people avoid friction like it’s contagious. You get silence, headphones, curated feeds, algorithm-approved viewpoints. A city famous for loud opinions now treats disagreement like a hazard. You can’t love New York and be allergic to conflict. The whole place was built on clashing perspectives in tight spaces.

The neighborhoods tell the same story. Harlem, Bed-Stuy, Jackson Heights, the Bronx; places with real history, real culture, real layers- are now treated like playgrounds or photo shoots. People move in for the “vibrancy” and then complain about music, vendors, block traffic, barbecues, church bells, and street activity. Basic New York things. Census data shows more than a third of the city’s residents were born outside the United States. This is an immigrant city by definition. But the tolerance that built that identity is thinning. Everyone claims they love diversity until diversity behaves like itself.

And the work ethic, the one thing the world admired about this city, is wobbling. The old New York showed up early, stayed late, hustled in between. Today, entire industries run on a mix of burnout and avoidance. You hear people say “the city changed,” but the city didn’t change on its own. People stopped carrying their share. They want the reward without the grind. The edit without the footage.

To love New York is to participate in it. To take the messy parts with the magic. To show up for the places that give it flavor. To let your neighborhood shape you instead of trying to tame it. You can’t love this city from a distance. You have to live it.